As I’ve previously mentioned on this blog, I’m currently working my way through old episodes of Saturday morning kids TV show, What’s Up Doc?. For a couple of years during the early ’90s, the series was the No.1 Saturday morning show, and I’m having a great deal of fun revisiting episodes via YouTube.
If you remember What’s Up Doc?, you might recall that during its early days the show featured many (many) colourful characters, such as Bro and Bro, Pasty the worm and Simon Perry.
But do you remember some of the other characters who appeared on the show? Do you remember the really creepy characters?
*Takes a deep breath*
Then let me tell you about eight of the weirdest personalities to ever grace Saturday morning television.
Professor Perry was the father of series regular, Simon Perry (aka Simon the Cheese Ranger). While Simon was harmless character loved by audiences, his father was a stern, unlikable sort who only made one appearance on the show.
It was probably for the best that he made only popped up once. It was heavily implied that Professor Perry was a Nazi – not the sort of person you want to see on a Saturday morning television show.
Alan and Alan Graves
Alan and Alan Graves were brothers. They were also two mannequin heads, operated by a nameless person wearing a black cloak.
I swear I am not making this up.
Alan and Alan Graves were heads on sticks.
The graves brothers made numerous appearances on the show, but at no point did anyone question who the person under the sheet was.
You think that’s weird?
It’s about to get even weirder.
Billy Box’s Mother
Billy Box – a man wearing a collection of boxes – was a series regular. Billy would turn up from time-to-time, cause a bit of chaos, and then fade back into the background.
So far, so bizarre. But things got even more bizarre, when during one episode Billy introduced his family, including his mother.
Unlike Billy, who was played by an actor in a costume, Billy’s mother was simply a lifeless collection of cardboard boxes.
A really scary collection of cardboard boxes.
Martin and Martin the maggots
Meet Martin and Martin, the maggots.
Martin and Martin turned up one week and promptly gave the audience nightmares.
They kind of look like Doctor Who villains don’t they?
Speaking of which…
Mr. Spanky and Naughty Torty
Perhaps the greatest source of nightmares on a Saturday morning came in the form of Mr. Spanky (left) and Naughty Torty (right).
Mr. Spanky appeared on the very first episode of What’s Up Doc?. He was a man, dressed like a dandy… in a gimp mask… with a waistcoat made of roast beef.
He also carried a turtle – called Naughty Torty – which sprayed ghee.
Mr. Spanky appeared on the show for a number of weeks before he was ultimately replaced by Naughty Torty – now a man-sized tortoise, carrying a Mr. Spanky doll. The doll would spray ghee at unsuspecting children.
Once again, believe me when I say, I am not making this up. THIS REALLY HAPPENED!
Sam Sam was a camp hairdresser with a pumpkin for a head. Every time Sam Sam appeared on What’s Up Doc?, his appearance was proceeded by the theme from The Exorcist.
Rather bizarrely, of all the creepy characters to appear on What’s Up Doc?, Sam Sam was the least frightening. Even when he was brandishing a pair of scissors.
And finally, I’ve saved the best (worst) for last. If this one doesn’t give you nightmares, nothing will.
Woolly was a man, dressed in a woollen mask.
Yes, that is a man in an ill-fitting mask which makes him look a little bit like Leatherface from the Texas Chain Saw Massacre.
There is nothing more to say.