It’s the big Easter weekend, and how do you make this Easter epic? Well, if you’re Warner Bros. Pictures and Legendary Pictures you release a new Godzilla/King Kong movie!
Bashing its way into UK and US cinemas from today, this new movie is titled Godzilla x Kong: The New Empire. The film is the fifth entry in the MonsterVerse – a shared cinematic universe featuring classic monsters – and takes place after the events of 2021’s Godzilla vs. Kong.
Directed by Adam Wingard, Godzilla x Kong: The New Empire stars Rebecca Hall, Brian Tyree Henry, Dan Stevens, and Kaylee Hottle. For those wondering, the ‘x’ in the title means the titular titans are now classed more like equals, rather than rivals, so for this latest offering we’ve entered the next stage of their friendship, which frankly is quite lovely.
In the film, Kong is living in the Hollow Earth following the battle with Mechagodzilla. Here he has a decent life (apart from some toothache), until he comes across a tribe of giant apes led by the Skar King, and things turn sour.
With the help of the ancient ice-powered titan, Shimo, the Skar King battles Kong and leaves him injured. This is the same Skar King that once had beef with Godzilla, had plans to take over the world, and is clearly an arse!
Realising he needs help to defeat the Skar King, Kong seeks out a newly evolved Godzilla so they can join forces to take down this fearsome foe. However, with Shimo also in the mix, Kong and Big G will need some additional support to tip the balance.
For those interested in my take on the previous MonsterVerse films (not that you asked), it goes something like this: 2014’s Godzilla was a bit dull, 2017’s Kong: Skull Island was great, 2019’s Godzilla: King of the Monsters was loud, and the aforementioned Godzilla vs. Kong was highly enjoyable. Skull Island is easily the best of the bunch, and arguably where the series peaked, but the MonsterVerse still has its moments of fun.
As for this new offering, Godzilla x Kong: The New Empire, well, it falls somewhere in the middle. It is better than Godzilla and King of the Monsters, but not as good as Skull Island or Godzilla vs. Kong.
For the most part it’s fine, but it is utter nonsense and all kind of pointless. As with last week’s Ghostbusters: Frozen Empire, Godzilla x Kong: The New Empire exists because the last film was well-received and made money, and not because there is a compelling story to tell.
But then, you probably already guessed this if you’ve seen a trailer for this film, which includes footage of crashing, smashing, and bashing, as well as a shot of Kong sporting some kind of mechanical arm attachment. Yes, the arm is a bit silly, but it really is par for the course for this film, so once it is strapped on you just accept it and move on.
The important question is: Is Godzilla x Kong: The New Empire enjoyable enough to gloss over the dafter elements? Yes, for the most part it is.
Godzilla x Kong: The New Empire is brainless entertainment, but it’s the sort of brainless entertainment that works. Sure, by the end it descends into a huge CGI-fest, with ape fighting ape and lizard fighting lizard, but oddly none of this is a major issue.
If you’re paying to see a MonsterVerse movie then this is kind of what you expect to get for your money, and as long as the action is coherent and the story is serviceable then it is enough. And the word ‘serviceable’ is exactly what the script for Godzilla x Kong: The New Empire is, as it gets everyone from A to B and that’s pretty much it.
In terms of characterisation, the human protagonists played by Hall, Stevens, etc, are mostly here to create a break from the action, but they are fine. This film doesn’t have the same level of character work as last year’s Oscar-winning Japanese film, Godzilla Minus One, but it could be worse and the humans get something to do.
The same can’t really be said of Godzilla himself, who appears to have been given the shitty end of the stick this time around. Despite headlining the film, Big G is more or less a supporting player for this movie, and not much more.
He gets a scene here, a scene there, and gets to smash the crap out of some pyramids, but his appearances are few and far between. If I was him, I’d be having a word with my agent to find out why he doesn’t have a bigger part.
On the opposite end of the scale is Kong, who is all over this film like a rash. He gets most of the scenes, has to do battle with various apes, and even finds time for a couple of minor procedures, including a tooth extraction!
I bet you never thought you’d see a movie in which King Kong requires a bit of dentistry, did ya?! Well, if ape teeth are your thing, this movie has you covered!
Outside of the above, Godzilla x Kong: The New Empire looks good, has an excellent ‘80s-inspired music score, and doesn’t drag too much. Of course, it is often complete bobbins and you will need to switch your brain off and agree not to question most of what you see on screen, but it’s fine for what it is.
The aforementioned Godzilla Minus One set the benchmark for Godzilla movies last year, and Godzilla x Kong: The New Empire doesn’t come close. However, if you want to watch a film in which one ape smashes another ape in the face, while using a third ape as his weapon, then dive in and enjoy.
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Thank you for taking the time to read this review on It’s A Stampede!. For more reviews, check out the recommended reads below.
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