In 1990, horror comedy Arachnophobia crept into cinemas. The creature-feature, directed by Frank Marshall, starred Jeff Daniels and John Goodman, and told the story of a small Californian town which becomes invaded by deadly spiders.
In the film, Daniels takes on the role of a doctor, who moves to the town to start a new life with his family. However, his arrival coincides with various deaths that are related to the spiders – something neither he, nor the other residents are initially aware of.
Featuring some great ‘death scenes’, plenty of black comedy, and one of two creepy moments, Arachnophobia is a real hoot of a horror movie. The film is daft, playful, and lots of fun, and if you’ve never given it your time, then be sure to correct that mistake.
But before you do, be sure to take a look at some of the best quotes from the movie. These are some of the witty lines from Arachnophobia, which highlight the fun that can be had in the film!
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The best Arachnophobia movie quotes
Henry Beechwood – “Bobby here, he’s a, he’s a Bronco star quarterback.”
Bobby Beechwood – “Hi.”
Molly Jennings – “Hi.”
Henry Beechwood – “I taught him to throw a football before he could walk. I coach the team.”
Molly Jennings – “Nepotism huh?”
Edna Beechwood – “Actually, we’re Baptists.”
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Milt Briggs – “What could have killed it?”
Dr. Ross Jennings – “The shock of seeing Lloyd?”
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Dr. Ross Jennings – “Chris, I’m scared to death.”
Collins – “Yeah, we all are, but our brains secrete a neurotransmitter that enables us to deal with them.”
Dr. Ross Jennings – “I don’t think I have that particular neurotransmitter.”
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Delbert McClintock – “Spiders would find your barn a tad breezy this time of year. In that respect, spiders are a bit like you and me. No, I frankly doubt there are any spiders in your barn.”
Dr. Ross Jennings – “Well, I frankly know there is Delbert. I saw a web! There is a web in my barn!”
Delbert McClintock – “…A web would indicate an arachnoid presence.”
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Doctor James Atherton – “24-hour ant.”
Jerry Manley – “They bite?”
Doctor James Atherton – “They kill, Mr. Manley, in sufficient numbers.”
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Delbert McClintock – “Would anyone object if I tore this floor out?”
Molly Jennings – “I would.”
Delbert McClintock – “False alarm then. Lead on.”
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Delbert McClintock – (After stepping on a spider, a dog barks in the background) Yeah, that’s right… I’m bad!”
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Dr. Ross Jennings – “Easy, easy with that. Don’t want to agitate the sediments. Chateau Margaux, 127 bucks a bottle.”
Mover – “Tasty, huh?”
Dr. Ross Jennings – “At that price, who can afford to drink it?”
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Doctor James Atherton – “In this first generation, the original male also produced a queen, and together they will construct a primary nest which the queen will guard. But eventually, she will create reproductive offspring of her own. And when that happens, this town is dead… and the next town… and the next town… and the next one, and so on.”
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Dr. Ross Jennings – “Not the Chateau.”
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Molly Jennings – “Why is all the wood rotting?”
Delbert McClintock – “I’ll tell you why. Bad wood.”
Molly Jennings – “So… what do we do?”
Delbert McClintock – “Tear out bad wood. Put in good wood.”
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Dr. Ross Jennings – “In my opinion…”
Margaret Hollins – “In my opinion, Dr. Metcalf isn’t aware of the difference between his ass and a hole in the ground.”
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Jerry Manley – “So how long will it take us to get back to camp?”
Doctor James Atherton – “What’s the matter? You still worried about dinosaurs?”
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(Dr. Ross Jennings has just informed his wife that Dr. Sam Metcalf has postponed his retirement, and that he is seeing his only patient tomorrow)
Dr. Ross Jennings – “We’re gonna be fine, we’ll be alright, just like you said.”
Molly Jennings – “With ONE patient?”
Dr. Ross Jennings – “Well, I mean, you know? Maybe I’ll get lucky and all of her systems will be ravaged by disease. Ya know, kinda like having seven patients in one.”
(Scene changes to Dr. Jennings surgery where he has just completed his examination of Margaret Hollins)
Dr. Ross Jennings – “Fit as a fiddle, not a damn thing wrong with ya.”
Margaret Hollins – “Dr. Jennings, I’m sorry.”
Dr. Ross Jennings – “Oh, sorry? What do ya mean you’re sorry?”
Dr. Ross Jennings – (under his breath) “You think I was hoping you were ravaged by disease?”
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Dr. Ross Jennings – “Come on, let’s go find that spider. And let’s find your mom to take care of that spider. Honey, we’re in the living room. We need you to kill a spider.”
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Molly Jennings – “What’s wrong?”
Dr. Ross Jennings – “Metcalf – he’s having a seizure.”
Molly Jennings – “Thank God you didn’t examine him this morning.”
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Dr. Ross Jennings – “Respect is fine, but actually I’ve always wanted to be feared.”
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And finally…
Sheriff Lloyd Parsons – (Introducing Delbert the exterminator to Doctor Atherton) “Excuse me. Professor? This is our town exterminator.”
Delbert McClintock – “Delbert McClintock, infestation management. Always nice to meet a colleague.”
Sheriff Lloyd Parsons – “Now, he believes he came across one of the offending spiders a couple of hours ago.”
Doctor James Atherton – “Might you have brought it with you?”
Delbert McClintock – “Actually, he’s probably still at the bottom of my shoe. You really can’t tell what it is anymore.”
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